The Abuse of Karma

Spiritual Gaslighting and Scapegoating & Alternate Explanations

When someone is in pain or has suffered through adversity, the worst thing you can do is say it is their fault.

Sometimes, that may well be the case, but unless you know this to be true with some degree of certainty (and the person is open and able to hear you with integrity) – this can be a deeply damaging statement.

Before you read on, do know that this article may trigger those who have been gaslighted, used, and abused by spiritual teachers and facilitators. It may also trigger facilitators who do not wish to reflect on their own practice. Continue reading if you see fit to do so.

In my work, I come across people who have faced profound degrees of suffering, be it sexual abuse, genocide, war, kidnapping, ritual abuse, and so on. And, of course, they have been told – directly or indirectly – that it was somehow their fault.

They ‘attracted’ it.

They ‘manifested’ it.

It was their karma based on their past sins that they must now pay.

Their astrology was bad, so it happened.

I have seen that the people who use these excuses when those seeking guidance come to them honestly do not have a clue. They either cannot handle the situation, do not have the right frame of reference or experience, or lack the humility to say, ‘I’m sorry, I do not know.’

I know that sounds harsh, but there is no point in sugar-coating it.

Over years of searching, the only teacher I have found consistently in alignment and integrity was the one who knew how to say, “I do not know, but I will help you to the best of my ability.”

This is the only person who gave me the tools to help myself and escape a terrible situation.

What I have learnt from him and developed for myself through his guidance, I subtly integrate into the T-23 program. It is rather intense, so I go about it as gently as I can. This work is still too intense for some to handle, as it takes a deep willingness and commitment to see the Truth, first and foremost.

In my own life, given the sudden physical health crises that led to immobility – which NO astrologer or diviner from any system ever predicted – I have been in search of answers for myself.

I was the only one who saw this coming to some extent because I was the only person looking at Thereus. I talk about it often as part of my work, as the information can be life-saving if known beforehand.

In my search for answers, I have faced the gauntlet of gaslighting, scapegoating, abuse, and unaligned work that did more harm than good. But I learned what not to do with those who came to me for help, as I would not wish it on anyone. Addressing the effects of trauma from spiritual abuse has also become a part of my journey.

This is not the same as the the ego feeling invalidated or butthurt for realizing you don’t know shit. I had that experience when I met my teacher and was honestly depressed for a week. But I got back up, and learnt what I needed to save my life and be a better facilitator.

Spiritual abuse is a very different thing. It overlaps greatly with narcissistic abuse tactics as they often occur together. I have seen this so many times over the years, in so many different ways.

I have seen the so-called teachers who were so intimidated by my own energy that they felt the need to put me down and make me feel like I could not speak.

I have seen those who are so convinced of their own perspective that any information they feel they receive must be right.

I have seen those who would commit egregious acts of energetic abuse because they felt they could at moments when I was literally paralyzed.

I have seen those who made the journey so much more challenging because they did not consider whether it was their place to intervene or if they had the right tools and sight.

I have seen those who would manipulate spiritual information to make a seeker more vulnerable and willing to follow their rules, paths, or plans.

And those who became defensive when called out on their own assumptions, agendas, inaccuracies, and acts of abuse.

The thing with any kind of spiritual work, especially something as delicate as understanding karmic causality, is that you need to be willing to say

I do not know. I will do my best. Work with what feels right for you.

Because the origin, cause and nature of suffering is a deeply complex thing.

If a reader (no matter how gifted) does not have the right to read for you, they cannot.

If they do not acknowledge it, they often see a fantasy or a distorted image of the person that does not reflect reality.

I have learned to ask whether readers have the permission and skill level to work with someone of my background and experience beforehand. Their response always tells me a lot about them.

When I asked a particular reader if she had the right to read for me, she claimed that I needed to clear and focus my mind so that I could meditate… as everything was so blurry …

I meditate for several hours each day and channel Divine energy that is sometimes visible in 3-D and able to be photographed, and directly felt groups of people. Birds and other animals will often come to visit and participate. So that was that.

Though she could read for others, she did not have the permission or experience to read for me—and that is the case for some souls. So, what she saw was a distorted image. She was not mean or manipulative but did not know her limitations and we agreed to part ways. I wish her well but am grateful I asked first.

Such protections are put in place for people with certain contracts. Those who seek to see what is not theirs to know will not be able to – and will mess up their own karma if they seek to interfere without permission.

Another reader felt so off in the first five minutes (this was at the worst of times) that I stopped the session, offered to pay for half to respect her time and left it. She chased after me immediately via email justifying her process and how I needed to ‘ ground out with black tourmaline’. It was honestly an embarrassing experience and I immediately drew boundaries and cut ties. (Nothing she said in the short time I heard her actually came to pass).

I am sharing these experiences here as I know so many of you have been through the same – but perhaps have had less experience with saying No, Thank You. And yes – you can absolutely do that – always.

Now in the case of an actual (and intentional) manipulator, what they see or share will inevitably be distorted in ways to make you more vulnerable.

These are spiritual predators wearing the robe of the teacher, and enough people have experienced these effects to know that such people exist. And sometimes they’re skilled enough to mask their intent, even from others who can see.

The most heartbreaking cases are where people believe they are doing good but refuse to see how their work has caused harm. This, too, is a form of predation, and it is why everyone doing this work needs to have safeguards, room for reflection, and be committed to constant self-examination.

In my own practice, I have refunded numerous clients for whom I simply did not have permission to read—even though I could look at a chart and tell them x,y, and z.

This work is not about skills alone. It is subtle and requires diligence, humility, and the willingness to be aware that the Universe is much, much, vaster than we realize.

It also means not seeing people as resources you can use by hooking them to you. This is why I have a six-month rule for most clients before they can make another booking.

But is everything you read about karmic cause and effect online wrong? Not necessarily.

The small fragments of spiritual teachings that get regurgitated all over the place have grains of Truth, but without the larger picture, they can be detrimental in themselves.

In my own life and practice with thousands of clients with unique, complex soul stories, I have found that the reason bad things happen isn’t always straightforward.

Sometimes it is not because a person is bad, has a bad childhood, or has ‘bad karma’.

In some of the more surprising cases, it is often due to a service contract made with some understanding of divinity at an earlier time.

Sometimes, it is the contract to protect a specific person, cause, or group—even if that is no longer relevant today.

Sometimes, a person who endures terrible and horrible pain does so because they believe that is honestly the best way to serve.

Sometimes, they have taken a vow to have a certain kind of experience.

Sometimes, they are involved in work that challenges many entrenched, power-addicted energies, which push back against those who seek to love, liberate, and heal.

There are so, so, many reasons why ‘bad ‘things happen to good, kind people.

Those with these kinds of karma have found immense relief in hearing and knowing that what is happening to them is not because they are somehow fundamentally flawed, evil, or deserving of pain due to some divine mandate.

When there is an accurate understanding of karma, i.e., cause and effect, then — and only then — can patterns be cleared. Only then does the soul realize … I can let this go now and choose something else.

Otherwise, you will end up in an endless pattern of searching, being gaslighted again and again by those who lack perspective but will not admit to it.

Of course, there are those who experience pain because they have caused terrible suffering to others.

When this is known, it can be expressed, and the appropriate measures of re-balancing can be taken—to whatever extent is appropriate and possible.

But it should not be the first port of call for explanation just because it is the easiest claim to make.

Think about the power dynamic in someone who claims to know more than you and how much control they have over you if they can convince you of your own uncleanness, inferiority, or worthlessness. And if they keep wanting you to return, they can ‘fix’ you.

This is why those who do this work must have the experience and humility to know what they can see and cannot. And to know when and where to draw the line when the client simply does not wish to hear something unpleasant.

The idea that you are somehow uniquely connected to God and have information no one else does is in itself a massive ego hook.

Even if you do, stay humble.

Especially if you do.

Humility does not mean downplaying who you are.

It means being willing to do your best and keep seeking ways to improve, to know more, or to come into better alignment with Spirit.

It is the absence of the assumption that you are ‘ already there’ and that there is a pedestal where you sit and others must watch you from beneath.

It also means staying true to your integrity, even if people see you in whatever way feeds into their own fears, anxieties, illusions, and complexes.

You can be a powerful force of truth, but always do your self-work and look for alternate explanations where you do not know. Or admit that you don’t.

So what can you do if you do have some karmic reason pushing specific cycles of pain in your life?

That honestly comes down to your case.

Everyone is unique, and some souls are a lot harder to read than others. That is why I take as much care as I do in my work before, during, and after a session. Especially if someone is hypersensitive, pregnant, or has already experienced significant spiritual abuse.

Sometimes, a person’s higher aspects may clearly say they do not want a session, or their ancestors may not be particularly thrilled by the idea, as my work does not condone or tolerate abuse. All of this must be looked at before work is done.

To be perfectly honest, I am probably a little over-cautious but … the karmic cost of treating any soul with a lack of care and respect is more than I am willing to incur. That again, does not mean sugar-coating the truth, but to be real in your assessment of whether you can help, and if you have the permission to do so.

Know that the metaphysical transmutation of karma is an alchemical process in itself. It is sensitive and fluid and requires understanding context, permission, timing, and scope.

My only general recommendation to anyone seeking to change their karmic patterns is to walk with Grace, Humility, Love, Faith, and the willingness to do Good in appropriate ways.

If you have been trying your best and have only found answers that seek to blame you or make you feel bad about yourself, remember that there are other potential explanations.

In my case, I followed many of the prescriptions offered by those who saw karma as a punitive force for years and years, but there was no real change. That is how you know that your circumstances might be different.

When you find an aligned explanation, you’ll feel that ‘ click ‘ at the level of the soul. Even if your ego feels punched in the gut.

In my case, my teacher taught me to find that answer for myself and I will always be grateful for that opportunity to learn and help others.

Remember these words as you seek guidance from anyone, especially at this time.

With Love,

Dr. Bairavee, The Sky Priestess

© The Sky Priestess, 2013-2024. All rights reserved.

Image: Eberhard Grossgasteiger (Brown Bird Flying New Mountain, Free to Use)